agameofme:

“We all are born with a certain package. We are who we are: where we were born, who we were born as, how we were raised. We’re kind of stuck inside that person, and the purpose of civilization and growth is to be able to reach out and empathize a little bit with other people. And for me, the movies are like a machine that generates empathy. It lets you understand a little bit more about different hopes, aspirations, dreams and fears. It helps us to identify with the people who are sharing this journey with us.”

We hear Roger Ebert say these words early in the documentary Life Itself. I think that I’ve perhaps felt more “stuck inside” who I was born as than a lot of people, and this is a big part of why, when I was younger, movies (along with games, books, and music) were things that I latched onto strongly. I was able to connect with them directly, as the person I was in my heart, circumventing all the excruciating and exhausting social artifice that went along with my experience of being transgender. Nothing came between me and them. They were a way in which I could escape myself for a while and feel connected to the experiences of someone else.

But of course, movies can only do so much. At a certain point, we need to actually try reaching out to each other.

Right before I saw the film, a friend was texting me as I was sitting in a coffee shop reading Communion: The Female Search for Love by bell hooks. My friend was worried that, by asking for a little from a man she’d been involved with, she was asking for too much. I tried to tell her that it’s not weak but strong to reach out, to ask for more, that it’s our bullshit culture that says that it’s weak to prioritize love, but that actually love should be a priority, something, as bell hooks says, that we should pursue with zeal, something that we should expect to demand things of us

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I like that Life Itself takes seriously the importance of love in Roger’s life. Roger knew how important love was, writing in his memoir of the early days of his relationship with Chaz, “I was in love, I was serious, I was ready for my life to change. I had been on hold too long.” (He also wisely wrote, “You never get anywhere with a woman you can’t talk intelligently with.”)

Roger was keenly aware of the passage of time. I think I am, too. He was obsessed with the closing lines of Gatsby. I am, too. He was 50 when he and Chaz were married, and that was not too late for love to save him.

I think that’s beautiful, and hopeful.

I just saw Life Itself and those opening words from Ebert struck me as well. I believe it, but I believe that video games can be just as powerful in generating empathy if not more so, though you’d never know it without digging deep into the medium because the headline-grabbing titles are anything but empathetic.

I was also struck by all the filmmakers who lent their voices to the documentary by speaking openly about their relationship with Ebert. It made me laugh (out of embarrassment) that such a kerfuffle is going on right now in the world of game criticism about “ethics” and “disclosure.” Ebert and Scorsese were friends for decades. Ebert was a champion for Scorsese when his career was in a rut. But Ebert didn’t hesitate to review Scorsese’s films, and he didn’t need to add a disclaimer to them “disclosing” their friendship. if anything, Ebert’s connection to Scorsese better informed his view of Scorsese’s work.

Whatever, I shouldn’t pay the “collusion” crowd as much mind as I did writing that paragraph - they’re not worth it. Life Itself is a gripping documentary and I wholeheartedly recommend it - it’s on Netflix right now.

Source: agameofme